--I wrote this in May of this year. Consolidating all my posts to this blog.
I often hear these crazy concepts these days - Mr. Right. The Perfect Man. The Perfect Woman. Prince Charming... Terms at least I would consider strange or at least to me a little bit foreign.
I recently looked at a friends dating service website to see what people my age were looking for. Being a guy, I obviously searched for females in their 20's... I was surprised to find the exact same thing on pretty much every profile I found. Here's how it seemed to me:
"Great girl seeking mature man. Loves spending time with me. Wants to build a family with me [optional] Would love someone who makes me laugh, has goals in life [to take care of me], and [basically] will make me happy by full filling all my needs..."
I would offer that people often project their desire for fulfillment [that can only be truly filled by God] onto other people. Wiser people than I have suggested that it is safer and more effective to look to other people to relieve our emptiness. In some cases when love is sweet and budding some would think they've found it. Sadly these feelings are misleading. This suggests or reinforces our sinful idea that people might be the answer to our needs...
So we pursue people as an obsession. The love that we desire can only be found in the living God - Jehovah creator of all things, Jesus Christ who atoned for our sins, and the Holy Spirit who moves us.
I guess I was deeply moved by reading in Hosea this week. You know... The guy who married a prostitute. Correction. The guy who God INSTRUCTED to marry a prostitute. Strange. A little perturbing even. But you see it's the clear example of how God loves you and me. You see Hosea's wife was into all kinds of crazy things. Her name was Gomer. She had many lovers and continued even after marriage in her lustful ways. But the story isn't about Gomer's short comings... Instead it is about Hosea's [and by extension God's] faithfulness.
God was saying to Hosea something to the effect "You and I are both going to give our hearts completely to someone who will utterly reject us. We will give all of our hearts, energy, time and money in pursuit of them. By doing this, you, Hosea, will understand my faithful love for you and your people. You see, I, myself am the husband. Your life will be about My love. Your pain will point to My own. And your faithfullness will be a replica of Mine."
It got to the point where Gomer was forced into slavery. I was trying to wrap my mind around this. A slave was a piece of property back then. It was like saying Hosea's wife was worth maybe a meal or a set of clothing. I can't imagine what Gomer went through. She was naked before all her kin. She was exposed. It was finally out. People didn't think she was worth much. But this is the part of the story that really gets me. Hosea bought her back and immediately covered her. He essentially said "I am your and you are mine. I belong to you alone, you belong to me and no other."
Amazing. Case in point. God is the only one who's perfect. God is the only one who can satisfy. The concept of Mr. Right or Prince Charming is just an allusion to a much deeper need - God.
Nobody is perfect on this earth. You will not find satisfaction in another human being. At least not the type your looking for. People will invariably reject you. People will threaten you. People will make you feel ashamed.
Well, that's not exactly great news... But here are three things that complete that thought.
Those who are rejected are accepted and glorified through God's glory. God's acceptance is not begrudging it is full of rejoicing and singing!
Those who are threatened are comforted and glorified through God's glory. Pain will be a part of a greater security in knowing that the creator and savior of the world calls us beloved one.
Those who are ashamed are covered and glorified. No longer hiding from the scrutinizing gaze of others are the gentle eyes of the King of Above All Kings looking lovingly at you through the words of Jesus "Come, Come!"Through God's Holy Spirit God gives His greatest Gift - Himself.
God's love is self-sacrificing. This is our example. This is what we are to become.
The focus isn't on finding that perfect one to love us but instead to love God and through Him love others around us. The answer isn't to love our inner child more or ourselves.
The Answer is to love God completely with all our heart, soul, mind.
Perhaps then loving another person whole heartedly would come easier and result in less divorces?
The calling isn't to allow our simple cup to be filled. You see there isn't enough of us to hold all of God. Our calling is to allow ourselves to be broken and remade into something that will fit into His plan - a specially molded cup designed to overflow into other specially molded cups.So maybe this is more about God than about that special someone. If or when God sees fit to allow my path to cross with such a woman perhaps my prayer isn't that she'll truly love me.
Instead my prayer is that she will love He who loves me. If she madly loves God maybe He can put it into to her heart to accept me for all my short comings, faults, flaws... Because she will see Him in me. And that will make it worthwhile to take a chance at this thing called marriage [which i hear takes a ton of work & patience] in the adventure some would call life.